Friday thing : my mom

(She's actually a human being; the photo is the thing)

Today is my mom’s birthday so I wanted to find a Friday thing that best represents her in my mind. She’s given me tons of things [beyond life itself] that I love dearly, but this photo is my favorite tangible item. The beige blur of a 1968 summer, the way her blouse & Capris match the brown grass and the bronze Corvair, the casual cross of her bare feet, the hint of furrowed brow. I wonder what she had just said, or was starting to say.

I’m reminded of the poem Punctum/Metaphor by Christina Ebeid about a photo of her father as a young man in the West Bank, about to throw a rock. My mom was 21 in this picture, pregnant with me and sitting on a car she bought with her own money, about to birth a child. When I was 21, I had barely made my way to a fourth year of college and could no more buy my own car - or become a competent mother - than walk on the moon.

I look at this picture and marvel. I came from here, from her, never once thinking this woman might be feeling too young or uncertain or incapable.

I wish I could have ever looked this cool.

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I wrote this for my mom, the new one and the now one.

“Love remains a kind of present tense.” ~ Carolina Ebeid from Punctum/Metaphor

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Résumé

She's been a young mother, a single mother, a drag racing & dating mother, a working mother, a mother of two, a second mother, a mother-in-law, a grandmother.

A grand mother. 

We are different:
I never did take a BB to the face, drag race, or glue hair to my face 
to become a werewolf.

And the same:
Baking banana bread, furrowing brows, 
stopping at garage sales.  

Things I know because of her:
Family is important even when embarrassing and/or exasperating.
Neil Diamond is pretty great.
Broiled cheese on crackers is hugely satisfying.
Quality is key, in work + play.
If something is valuable to my child,
it must be valuable to me.
There is a difference between time spent
and time invested.
Sometimes it's necessary to let go.

Things she taught me to do:
Be creative about helping others.
Make effective signage.
Color however you like.
Mow a lawn.
Wash a car.
Take time to nap.
Eat ice cream often.
Pay attention.

Accomplishments:
Fifty praiseworthy years of marriage
Devoted to the Seahawks despite 50 years of relentless Cowboys fanhood by her husband & first born
Admirable, upstanding children & grandchildren
Decades of patient cooking with middle schoolers
Excellent Waldorf salad every Thanksgiving
Knowing when to say the thing that needs saying

She is and has always been the best candidate for this job.