Friday thing : dining set

Because moving brings out a lot of feelings about furniture.

As we continue our quest for a New Home after nearly 28 years where we are, I’ve decided Midcentury Modern is my style of choice. Back in my younger optimistic days (September), I started collecting magazine pictures in a notebook to help organize what I wanted a [surely imminent] New Home to look like. In November [with my naive belief that The One was near] I began to earnestly look for items at thrift stores and consignment shops while asking our kids to consider which pieces of furniture & decor they wanted before I put them on Buy Nothing.¹ Then as I panicked matured during this months-long house-hunting process, I found myself struggling to do anything but check/recheck the Redfin app and message our realtor about emailing people who got the houses we really wanted, to see if they were thoroughly satisfied.² I finally turned to my Marie Kondo book³ [ironically gathering joyless dust on a shelf] and discovered this bombshell on page 9:

If you haven’t even found a new house yet, then start tidying right away…it’s the house you live in now that will lead you to your next house.

That alone set a fire under me, then I found she had even more to say on her website that not only gave me direction but helped make sense of the low-level anxiety & sadness I felt whenever we thought we were close to getting a new house: I needed to honor the place + things I’ve lived with & loved so long, and realize that graciously letting them go to a new owner is a kindness. I appreciate how corny this sounds, but it really has given me peace to say thank you⁴ and know someone else is going to be glad to get our stuff.

So here I am in mid-January, going ahead with new purchases that spark joy and giving away what has lost its charm for us. This dining set has always felt a little formal but it was beautifully, solidly constructed from cherry wood in Kentucky, good for accommodating a lot of people + stuff, and only $200 for the table, six chairs, and a buffet. I saw a For Sale ad in an actual newspaper in 1996, drove a couple of hours after school one afternoon to look at it, called my husband from the seller’s house (because 1996) to make sure he & a friend could come get it on the weekend. We felt so grown-up having A Real Dining Set that included a buffet; I scoured garage sales every weekend for tablecloths, placemats, and cloth napkins to store in the drawers. During summer break, I bought fabric & batting for the first (and last) time in my life and competently⁵ rejuvenated the chair seats.

For the first few years, I diligently polished all of this glorious wood, but then we had kids. And cats. Look closely at the buffet to see where Rocky, our first and most precocious cat, misjudged exactly how far it was to the top; there are more scratches on top from his frantic scampering when we yelled. The scuffs along the bottom showcase my reckless vacuuming habits.

I was too weary to put the drawers back for a photo op after I started moving them. Plus once again Zelda perfectly matches me with her Are We Really Ready to Let Go vibe.

Our table stayed shiny through the years though still sported a round white mark where we foolishly set a trivetless hot dish. Overall I’m proud of how much we used this otherwise fancy piece of furniture to not only enjoy family meals & conversations & birthday celebrations but also to spread out homework, write stories, make posters, build LEGO sets, [gently] race cars, and even prepare props for at least one zombie movie.

Thankful for your service.

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We had a new dining set delivered on Monday. It was a fine distraction from other events that day; I gave the delivery crew a substantial tip for their work on a holiday, and for kindly taking care of that empty space for me.

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1. Their increasing level of dismay when I ask is startling, though I’m glad to know they also feel the connections. I’ve promised not to change everything when we move.
[NB: We won’t be able to afford to. #CryingLaughing]

2. I wish I were joking.
We owe our realtor a new car or Seahawks tickets or at least a fancy dinner…

3. Our local humane society runs a thrift store that supports the organization and their .49 book section is one of my favorite places in town.

4. Let’s all of us who cry through every Toy Story movie acknowledge out loud that inanimate objects indeed have feelings.

5. Barely, to be honest; we’ve used chair pads for the last ten years or so and they’re still intolerable after 15 minutes of sitting. BUT THEY ARE PRETTY.