Last week1 Recently I posted a few good things about my doings at the start of 2023 and promised to return with a part 2. Then I left town/my laptop to work [on Not Writing], returned after midnight on Monday, spent Tuesday sleeping in, petting my grudge-holding cats, watching Netflix, eating chips, getting a haircut & massage, and taking one of the grudge-holders to a vet appointment. Then Wednesday got away from me, so the schedule is a bit off but I didn’t want to deprive you, my “tens of readers” any longer.
July
In life (and sneaky new poetry): Son got married/I felt that hook most keenly2 and started this page. Newsletter? Blog? Still don’t know what to call it. Or myself.
In entertainment: To shake off the tears of my son’s wedding [due only to feeling old/perimenopausal and missing him around our house; I cherish his wife, and not just because she diligently reads + appreciates my posts3], I bought tickets to see the spectacularly funny Cameron Esposito the week after. Her comedy is smart & poignant & relatable even to not-lesbians and straight guys, plus she is stunning even when not feeling it. I was constantly distracted by how comfortable yet stylish & hot she looked in her jeans, boots, and t-shirt (fun fact: I attempted to buy said shirt online after the show but it was sold out…nearly cried. #PerimenopauseStrikesAgain). Also, I left a post-show comment on her Instagram that took me a lot of minutes to compose so I didn’t sound too bananas girl-crushy4.
In food (and shopping): At the end of July, we were invited to work in Raleigh, North Carolina so of course I immediately started constructing a Map Guide of the area around our hotel, highlighting locally owned shops & restaurants. Considering our hours, it is sometimes hard to actually visit many of the places but thank the southern gods we were able to get into ORO and Bittersweet during our weekend stay.
Because the menu looked delectable and reviews were solid, I made a dinner reservation at ORO for the evening we arrived in town. It was on the later side as we needed to check in to the hotel then freshen up after our 8 hours of flying; when we arrived a few minutes late, they were only welcoming & gracious. The space is open and elegantly spare yet comfortable. Everything we ordered was sublime: goat cheese, beet, and almond salad; pork belly skewers, calamari, and grilled octopus; smoked duck pastrami rigatoni + five kinds of mushrooms. Cocktails were as deliciously crafted as they were named (see my ‘Bathtub Hooch’ in the photo). They boxed banana bread pudding - with a whole banana caramelized on top - for us to take away and it was possibly the best breakfast I’ve ever had in a hotel. Chef Chris Hylton is a superstar, using his expertise to blend unique international flavors + comfort foods, and Raleigh is lucky he found his way to them.




We also made our way one late night over to Bittersweet, a tiny spot next door to ORO with a whole different aura. Where ORO is a more luxe choice for fancy date nights, this place is your hip aunt’s spot to gather with friends. They do have equally delicious & slyly-named cocktails, as well as a S’mores sundae with housemade marshmallow cream, torched for the full campfire effect. But the best thing I got to take away was a gloriously droll t-shirt souvenir that actually got me a free drink on the plane home.
August
In music (and bonus book): I already discussed the joy of Japanese Breakfast back in real time. That month I also got to see Tegan & Sara again [3rd time I think? Maybe 4th. They are beyond worth it - fun, funny, hugely talented songwriters + performers] as well as Patti Smith, someone I never knew I needed to experience but am better because I did. Her work has been on the edge of my consciousness forever, as someone who has never been fully content listening to Top 40 radio or watching MTV video countdowns (that was a thing once upon a time, younger readers), fascinating me. But her gritty city, bluntly out loud, Mapplethorpe-loving self intimidated my small town girl sensibilities. Now I hate that I missed so many years of learning about life & lyrics (poetry really) from her. An excellent, insightful accompaniment is her utterly lovely and inspirational A Book of Days. My Friday things aspire to become such a marvelous touchstone.
In movies: *WARNING - Another controversial “good” recommendation here. I dragged my husband and best friend to see Oldboy5 during its 20th anniversary showing at Portland’s Hollywood Theatre. All I knew is “critically acclaimed” plus writer/director Park Chan-wook & I share a birthday, which usually means extra good things [to me]. And, this movie really is fantastic in all the ways a film ought to be: compelling, unpredictable storyline; believable acting + astute direction; appropriate pacing; thought-provoking & memorable. The tagline - After being kidnapped and imprisoned for fifteen years, Oh Dae-Su is released, only to find that he must find his captor in five days - is technically accurate, though you will laugh and laugh about it after watching. When you come out of your bewildered stupor.
September
In places: I almost subtitled this “In food” but all we ate here were corn nuts, and some ice cream that came with my cocktails. Saying “In drinks” also feels inadequate. And so, Here Nor There is exactly the right name for this establishment in Austin. They are like a speakeasy in that you need not only a code word to enter but reservations & directions are through the app only. The carefully, deliciously designed drinks all have stories - actual short poems with sweet illustrations in a leatherbound book; ingredients are exotic, odd, a bit precious yet the combinations are perfect. However, waitstaff are not the eyeroll-worthy hipsters one might expect from such stagecraft; they are friendly, knowledgeable, and excited to explain everything. Our time in this cozy underground space was refreshingly wonderful. Aside from the startling taxidermied bear at the entrance. #PrepareYourself
In movies: Another content warning, apologies if horror isn’t your thing. Barbarian is the kind of scary movie that frightens on the downbeat. It brings the classic tropes - woman alone, dark rainy night, loud noises, nice guy with creepy undertones/creepy guy with charming undertones, cars not starting when someone is chasing, weird historical lore - but those are distractions & red herrings. Or are they? The story starts to feel resolved pretty early as characters make the decisions we viewers are usually yelling at them to do. It confuses our sensibilities. There are, of course, the typical villain monologues, but overall this movie comes to truly scare, and it succeeds.
October
In books: I devoured Claire Dederer’s Monsters - A Fan’s Dilemma within a few days of checking it out at the library, then I had to order it for myself so I could go back through and flag pages & passages. I wanted it to be a seminar class on living life & enjoying it well, though I think the point ultimately is that we will always walk a bumpy road. I found myself nodding and YESing constantly, even when Dederer went from one point of view to its opposite; she is meticulous with her reasoning & evidence throughout. I felt more keenly that razor’s edge of knowing and choosing to ignore. It’s an uncomfortable place to be, but we need to revisit it often if we’re going to call ourselves intelligent & also caring.
In food: When P!nk cancelled her Tacoma concert after our Airbnb refund window closed, we decided to have a date night anyway. We looked for a nearby locally owned restaurant and happened upon Cuerno Bravo, a labor of love from Mexican American cook David Orozco. Every bite of food was infused with his heritage & vision, meaning it was extraordinary in quality and flavor. We texted our Seattle besties during dinner to tell them we would be bringing them there sometime. This video was made about his other restaurants in the area but it shows his impassioned commitment to creating not just great food but also an excellent experience.
November
In entertainment: We have been watching the folks who make up The Siren Theater for a long time - many were part of Live Wire Radio before it became a big deal NPR show and we could mingle with them at the side of the stage. The members have formed and re-formed into various comedy troupes, usually performing sketches & improv skits but also developing improbably, outrageously funny interpretations of classic movies so bad they’re good like Roadhouse, Weekend at Bernies, and The Lost Boys. This fall, we watched Wonderland, a sketch comedy created by writer/actor/director Jason Rouse incorporating some of his teen drama students. When you find yourself in or around Portland, Oregon, get tickets to whatever is on here. It will definitely enhance your mood.
In food again: I usually avoid chain restaurants unless in a hurry to board a plane or need to avoid fainting while shopping, but my daughter & her boyfriend suggested Kizuki Ramen & Izakaya after we finished moving them into their new apartment. Zero disappointments here, other than having to make a choice instead of getting a taste of everything. Speedy service, fresh & flavorful, ample space for a whole family.
December
In books: My sister and sister-in-law (not married to each other - one I grew up with, the other grew up with my husband; both named Michelle though…Digression!6) each got me a subscription to Bookishly for my birthday so I’ve been receiving obscure old novels along with literary-themed tea since August. Last month I read The Parasites by Daphne du Maurier, author of the more popular & iconic Rebecca. To be honest, the really good thing here is the Bookishly Tea and Vintage Book Club. The Parasites incorporates du Maurier’s typical wicked observations of society and sharp character descriptions, which are delicious, but in the end no one feels particularly redeemable. The overall vibe is despairing. It is fun, however, to see how closely du Maurier in real life resembled the thoroughly unlikable self-centered main character she created.
BIG SIGH, from both of us, I suspect. Sorry to end on a bit of a downer - though the book club is great; try it out!
Thank you for at least skimming (sorry about the email formatting); I hope a few things resonate and make their way into your 2024.
Losing track of days is part of the new year vibe, right?
From Dear Life by Maya Popa, to be shared & discussed properly here soon
Though obviously that is a plus and she gets extra banana bread for it
As wildly horrifying as the trailer is, it still does not properly prepare you for the mindboggling level of disturbance you will experience in two hours. Watch at your most hardy discretion.
From The Catcher in the Rye, one of the very few amusing elements (though it also becomes depressing in the end)
SO many great tips and tid-bits <3